It’s hard to listen, especially these days. When we talk with a friend, a family member, a co-worker, or even just listen to a TED Talk on YouTube, we drift in and out and struggle to “hang on every word”. The advent of devices only makes it worse: now, in addition to our normal human distraction, we have the serotonin addiction of our favorite apps and the latest digital interactions drawing our attention away from what is being said.
For the average speaker, whether on stage or just sitting across the restaurant table, this creates enormous problems for communication. We have more to say these days than we might have in another time—we’re flooded with ideas and information constantly. We speak, on average, 120 words per minute. That’s fast. If, for you presenters, you have 15 minutes to speak, you’re probably going to spew 1800 words at them. That’s a 4-5 page paper!
Most listeners won’t tell you if they’ve fallen behind. They won’t interrupt if you’re speaking too fast. They won’t ask you to cover a concept again, just so they can understand it more deeply.
Most listeners just smile and nod.
Knowing this is the case most of the time, we speakers public and private need to be more introspective, more self-critical, to really determine whether we communicate in a way that makes it easy for them to follow us. So what is the best way to communicate?
Slow down: That’s right. The first thing we should do is slow down, especially when we’re trying to change hearts and minds. To change a belief, people need time to consider and absorb.
Simplify: Write out what you want to say. Then go through and change every college word to a 5th grade word. Better to be heard than to be thought smart, but not get through.
Review everything: Identify your most important points and build in time to cover them again, and again, and again. Ask for understanding (without implying they’re idiots). Make sure you’ve been heard, and don’t move on till you know they’re with you.
You won’t cover as much ground when you speak this way, but what you do say will matter more. After all, what’s the point in covering 4-5 pages of material if they can’t recall the first point?
Question: What do you do today to ensure you are a good, pragmatic communicator?
